forever and always...

Saturday, May 24, 2008
Its finally over... u and me... i will carry with me our memories together.... I know it wont be easy but its not impossible... and I just can't do it anymore....


Its funny how time flies by so quickly, I thought I knew u so well... I thought I knew us so well.... but I guess I was wrong to think that way....


It took me ahwile to realise that what was left of u was already gone a long time ago, it was already gone when u started seeing her behind my back....


I blocked everything out because I was holding on to that guy who I use to love...hoping that he will come back to me... but he never did... he never did.... so all i can do is just let go...


Im thinking about u, about our lives before this... before the lies and hurt
We were in love... but I was naive and that got the best of me....

I could still recall that night under the tree... I will hold that in my memory for as long as I live...

Its funny how a heart can change so quickly and hurt so badly...

I hope your safe.... wherever u are...

I sent u a message... my final message before I leave.....

"dear ron, this will be my last message 2 u,
I think its best if I leave this relationship,
I wont get hurt and u wont feel guilty,
I wish it could have worked out, I reallydid,
N at this moment I dont think we can be frens, not now, maybe in another 10 years but no now...
plz take care of ureself cause i wont be able to take care of u...
Im leaving for good this time,
goodbye and be safe"


I guess by the time u read this I will be long gone....


( days when all I had was u)


i will always love u...forever and always

Luv,

dalila...

Our Results are in...

Thursday, May 22, 2008
Results were in.... alhamdullillah I pass... so i guess I'll see myself in fourth year. I dont sound right... I should be jumping for joy or make an announcement to the whole world that Ive finnaly completed my 2 years of struggle~! But I dont feel that way... I mean dont get me wrong I am happy, but admist of all the clouded smile I still have that melancoly accent when people ask..."so, dama..how did u do in ure exams?".....

Its actually a sharp pain jabbing through my chest.... Even though I passed PRO II but there are others who were left behind... others who did not make it to fourth year.... we dont leave a wounded soldier behind.... in this scenario.... its like im leaving them behind.... i know i shouldnt think that way... but the thought of not graduating together with ure frens, kinda sad dont u think..?

But I have vowed to myself that Whatever the outcome in the professional exams.... I WILL NOT LET tHE exams take away my spirit....and my friends.....

So to those who didnt make it for PRO II... I know what I say now may not bring you much comfort but I sincerely hope it helps... even a little....

"God works His miracles in so many ways... At the end of the day it is The Doctor YOu will become that brings out the best in you and the best for your patients.... A Good Doctor is not valued by the A's that is brought to the table but it's self and noble cause to treat those who are in need of our help"

So I guess for us to help, we must be equiped with all the knowledge that our brain can carry....failing does not mean your a failure, but it is those who choose to fight and never give up who will accomplish great things at the end of the day..."rome wasnt built in a day my dear"

ps/ HIV work is ALOT....seriously getting tired.... I have this "cupcake" food testing tommorow....hope everything works out for the best...at this point in my life, i coudnt give a F*** about what others are thinking... actually i find it very easy for people to condem... but it is those who do the work...who really understnd the struggle and the hardship of a noble cause....
like i said...."rome wasnt built in a day".... and I can assure u.... This campaign....with God's Will... insya-Allah will be a pivotal success.....so condem all u want... it just makes me stronger.....

lots of luv
-dama-

My COLd ChicKen Feet

Wednesday, May 21, 2008
okay its suppose to be purple.... but how come it looks pink? is it me or have i gone colour blind... its actually 2.49am in the morning, im blooody sleepy.... but my outrageously "cold chicken feet" is getting the best of me.... why??? yes WHy.... is my reckless cold chicken feet getting the best of me.... well simply because 2MORROW'S MY RESULTS~!!!! PRO 2~!!!! OH GOOD LORD....im outrageously scared to death.... i mean i dont know where i stand, I really hope I stand a good chance of passing.... oh God pls let me passs..... U know how hard it is to get through everything... Ive sincerely tried my best....and ive put my all in my exams.... now i leave my faith in the hands of God...."bertawakal".....

mummy plz praay for me :-(

i dont feel like i wanna write a lum sum of words today.... maybe cause my eyes and ears are not working at its best... so my brain cant translate the idea into words.... lucky me, i have wasted my rm70 on 2 pieces of casual top and a turquoise jacket.... online shopping is seriously addictive...trust me... dont start if u cant stop....

well... 2mrw i will finally know the truth.... the actual truth....
thank u God for everything that u have given me.... i am without doubt Your humble servant....

lots of luv
-dama-